I'll take those condoms, and that Sudaphed please, shhh.

Yes, it is good to finally be home, where I belong, after this tumultuous year and a half. I really missed the potholes and cold weather and daily family drama. Home is definitely the place you want to be. Even though spending more than a weekend with my son, the harbinger of sickness, has turned my immune system into a Swiss-cheese barricade. Yes, my son can catch the latest illness, wherever it may be in the tri-state area. His years of asthma-related ailments has made him into what I like to call a professional "sicker."

In my quest to find relief from this horrible head cold that inflicts me, I went to my friendly neighborhood Tar-jay and made a bee-line for the medicine aisle. If you have noticed, the "real" cold medicine is now stored behind the pharmacy counter. Apparently, industrious low-life's can make some sort of meth amphetamine out of regular Sudaphed. At any rate, you have to go to the pharmacy counter and show the clerk your license and sign your name to buy the shit. If you notice, when you are in the cold medicine aisle, there are those cards replacing the actual boxes in the cases. This is because the good shit that actually clears your nasal congestion is kept under lock and key. The real stuff has pseudoephedrine in it. This can be used to make meth-methamphetamine. Ugh, anyway, a two-bit impostor of pseudoephedrine is now in most of the cold medicines that you can actually touch on the shelves. It's called, Phenylephrine HCl. It's pretty much worthless. So if you are sick and miserable, do yourself a favor and go to the pharmacy counter and get the real meds.

I'm sorry If this post seems to be a rambling babble, but I am snorting crushed-up Sudaphed and baking soda. 

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